Don't Be A D*ck

This is the book nobody wrote for your father, and it's the reason your parents' marriage was probably harder than it needed to be. Think about that for a second. Your dad didn't have this book. Your uncles didn't have it. Your grandfather definitely didn't have it. Every man in your family line who walked into this same season had to figure it out with no map, no language, and no permission to talk about it.

Most of them didn't figure it out. Most of them either pulled away, shut down, or made the same small mistakes on repeat for ten years until the distance between them and their wives became the shape of their marriages.

You don't have to. You're the first generation of men who get to do this with information. If you’re reading this, you’re already ahead of the partner who checked out. If she bought you this book, you might feel a little defensive. Fair reaction. A book like this can feel like a verdict.

But many women don’t hand their partner something like this for punishment. They do it because they are exhausted, and they still want you, beside them. The villain in this story isn’t her. It’s not you either.

The villain in this story is the hormonal transition arriving in midlife and changes sleep, mood, memory, energy, confidence, libido, pain, and patience.

It can turn ordinary days into painful ones. This book is a practical plan for what to do next, and what to stop doing.

You didn’t wake up one day and decide to get this wrong. You love her. You’re doing your best. But lately everything feels harder than it used to. If you have thought: “I don’t understand what’s happening.” “She’s not the same.” “I miss us.” “I can’t win.”

You’re not alone. This stage can strain any strong relationship. Not because love disappears. Because the rules change, and many couples don’t get a guide. This is your guide.